Tag Archives: doubt

Doubt Demons

I passed out doubt demons in class today. I started class showing off mine. His name is Freddy.

I told the kids I write novels and love words and help edit others’ work, and still there are times I sit at the computer and hate everything about everything. I hate the way the words look, they way they feel when I say them, the scene they’re part of. I hate the commas and periods and pronouns. I hate it all. And if I let it, that feeling will consume me and the work and it’s so bad I just want to trash it all and start something shiny and new and fun. Something I can LOVE. But with my doubt demon around, I can pick him up, put him on my finger and say, “Not today, Freddy. Not today.”

After I told my story, I broke out the demons and invited the kids to choose their own. No one had to, but if they wanted one, they could take one, name it and have it out at their workstations while they work the rest of the year.

I thought I’d been pretty open about my writing, but as I told my story today my kids sat there listening and nodding their heads and even saying “Yes!” at times. They’re halfway through the year and they’ve faced all the doubt struggles that come with interviewing and writing and designing and photo stories. They know their work is going to be published and it lasts forever and the pressure is real. Some of them write creatively outside our class. They understand doubt. But until today I don’t think it ever really connected that I know doubt too.

I hope the doubt demons help us all banish the negativity and embrace the reality that the doubt is just part of the process.

*I ordered my doubt demons at Archie McPhee.

I’m thankful to Angelique L’Amour who introduced me to Doubt Demons at last year’s DFW Writers Conference. If you get a chance, definitely take her classes!

What I’m Loving: BrenĂ© Brown’s Dare to Lead, LCHF, Finals!, Saginaw Night Writers, Quest nacho cheese flavored chips

What I’m Writing: So Much For Happily Ever After

Books I’ve Loved This Year: Atomic Habits, Dumplin’

Where did the real me go, evil book!

I’m working on the complete of the manuscript requested by Intrigue. I loved this book when I plotted it. Since it’s a mystery I worked out the basic plot before I started writing. My CPs read it forever ago, made suggestions on pacing. I tend to rush through, keeping the tension edge of the seat so when something big happens it’s almost no big deal because something big is always happening. Not this time. (DId I use big enough in that sentence? big, big, big!)
So WHY do I suddenly question every single word between pages 50-75? WHY!!!???
I think I’ve read it too many times. Who knows if there’s tension, passion and drama? When you know the whole freaking thing by heart all that stuff tends to blend into the page. UGH!
Tomorrow, I’m just moving on. I’m not even going to read over what’s on the page. Until I work through this sudden freak out session I’m in the middle of, I figure it’s what I’ll have to do. I don”t like to write my stories in that way these days, but it’ll get me going again. No more reading old pages. Fresh, new pages await.

My Sister’s Keeper….MAJOR SPOILER ALERT/RANT!!!

I read what I wanted to be an excellent book this weekend. Right up until the last chapter it was amazing. And then the author KILLED the main character. She’d set up this incredibly sad story already, but it worked. I could handle the sadness because it fit the story. A 13-yr-old girl suing her parents for medical emancipation because she doesn’t want to give her dying sister her kidney is definitely going to make for teary moments. But then the author gets some crazy idea. Oh. I know. Let’s throw in a freaking twist and make my readers sob for hours because that is the only reason to pull this stunt. It serves NO OTHER PURPOSE! But I’ll let the sick sister live. UGH! That’s what I get for reading outside romance. UGH!! DD thinks I’m crazy. She says the irony at the end makes it worthwhile. My thoughts: Irony this. đŸ˜¦